murraythebastard.com
Featured Quote: "I can't watch today but will be looking for some companionship (in the back-pages-of-NOW-magazine sense of the word) for the game tomorrow."
| Contributor | Murray Story |
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| moteq Contributed: 2009-04-16 | Looks like Billy Bob may have outbastarded Murray on Jian\'s radio show. Step up, man! You\'ve got a reputation to uphold! |
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| carol stamp Contributed: 2009-01-18 | the future i think he should party with the shit creek campers on the cruiseeeaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!!! |
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| Phil Chamney Contributed: 2008-12-22 | How\'s little Dave? |
| Phil Chamney Contributed: 2008-12-22 | How\'s little Dave? |
| Stephanie Contributed: 2008-11-28 | I don\'t think you\'re really a bastard, Murray. Just a nice guy with a sexy voice, who pretends to be a bastard. Rock on, mate. |
| Squeaky Clean Contributed: 2008-06-29 | Happy Birthday Bastard. Here\'s to another year of broken promises, unpaid debts, missed parties and standing up your dates. |
| PASpy Contributed: 2008-06-28 | Here to report 2 things: I finally met Murray @ the GBS \"secret show\" last week. Drove from Pittsburgh to see it, so meeting Murray made it all worthwhile. He was funny and droll...as near as I can remember; I was sorta drunk. Think I told him about playing trivia w/Corb Lund in a Cleveland bar. Scintillating, eh? 2nd thing: did you all know Murray got whammed by his own mike stand during a show a couple of nights later - the Dakota Sessions one, I believe? Some drunk pogoing girl (not me, I wasn\'t there) knocked his mike stand into his mouth. Sean McCann noted the next day that Murray had a fat lip. He has a dangerous job, and seems anything but a bastard. But he\'ll probably be an asshole if I ever meet him again :). |
| Vera Contributed: 2008-05-24 | I apologize. I was mistaken. Although my cousin\'s drunken nights with Murray did result in the production of offspring, she now advises that Murray may simply have been present in the capacity of musical advisor and/or production co-ordinator of some sort. She is not concerned in any way about Murray or his activities but sends a cheery \"Hello!\" from the kids who are still smiling. |
| Vera Contributed: 2008-05-02 | My cousin has given birth to 3 of Murray\'s 8 children. Not all of them are good-looking, but they all smile alot. |
| A name wouldn\'t be very sporting, would it? Contributed: 2008-04-25 | You know, the Bastard\'s never been same after that unfortunate kidnapping in Buffalo about 10 years ago. I\'ve tried to apologize for it, but something about a Restraining Order keeps coming up. *checks GBS schedule* oo.. Akron, Ohio. See you there. I\'ll be the one with the handcuffs. |
| Aprille J. Rhomer Contributed: 2008-04-21 | I want to get drunk with MF and then fuck him six ways from Sunday. I want to get kinky with him using Grenadine and a jar of honey and have us bring each other to new heights of pleasure and ecstasy. I want to consume him body and soul. I want to drink his blood and any other bodily emissions I may extract from him. i am in love and I all-ways will be. |
| Girl in Green Contributed: 2008-02-26 | Scrabastard is creamin\' my arse and wants my sympathy cause he\'s got a Q he can\'t use....pfft....add your Q to my FU... |
| Girl in Green Contributed: 2008-02-06 | Murray is kicking my ASS. Scrabulous Bastard! |
| Blue Hat Contributed: 2008-02-04 | You assumed the title of League Commissioner, promising excitement and overdue reform. And like all bastard pols, you lived up to none of it. Shame, bastard. |
| anon Contributed: 2008-02-03 | anyone got pictures of the bastard in a Speedo? |
| Pamela et al Contributed: 2008-01-13 | P.S. Bastard. |
| Pamela and the Underfootniks Contributed: 2008-01-13 | \"Postcards from the road,\" she said, \"that\'s what I want. You waste my time with pages full of words that have no meaning and I really don\'t, want to read that much. I\'ve got better things to do with my day than waiting around for the mail to come my way, I, just gotta let you know. That postcards from the road,\" she said, \"that\'s the way to go.\" |
| Administrator Contributed: 2008-01-04 | Happy New Year\'s, you bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-11-27 | Okay, what the hell was the squee fest about? |
| anonymous Contributed: 2007-11-25 | LOL |
| :D Contributed: 2007-11-25 | I love you!!! LOL As a lover of music, and great big sea, you rock my socks off with your talent of the bass and baritone voice. To go highschool on you \"So Dreamy!\" LOL. After being able to listen to your music up close and personal, like 4 people away from you (stage left LOL), at the GBS concert for the Grey Cup Tailgate. I have decided that you are AWESOME and I want to meet you but I wont.....and for that you are a bastard LOL!! |
| Ahoy Matey! Contributed: 2007-10-18 | Legend has it Murray will soon be hitting the high seas. Great Big Sea on a great big boat doing time with The Barenaked Ladies. Looking at it from that perspective, Canadian bands really have silly names. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-09-24 | Murray hates boobs. Instead? He loves cukes. There is not stronger evidence: He is a bastard. A bastard on crackers. A bastard on toast. I\'ll bet he hates crackers, too. Bastard. |
| Peppermint Panties Contributed: 2007-09-18 | Hmmmm... much like his beloved TFC, is sounds as though Murray is also unable to score... and for that, he is a Bastard. |
| The BJ Contributed: 2007-09-17 | On Friday evening (after great music and binge drinking) Murray accompanied myself and three of my lady friends to a sketchy female strip joint on the west end. Stories were shared and breasts were bouncing when suddenly Murray jumped up and decided to leave because he was... TIRED. You could have lived out every fantasy you bastard. I hope your pillow was worth it! |
| Virtual Elitist Contributed: 2007-08-30 | I owe Murray $40 and that\'s just not cool. Nobody likes a debt hanging over his head. In fact, usually the person owed money to is considered a bastard. |
| girl in green Contributed: 2007-08-24 | Dude. Murray may be a top notch bastard, but he's also been called a top notch bass player. Malign his parentage, malign his sense of responsibility, malign his fashion sense or lack thereof, malign his hair or lack there of, malign his sexual prowess and I'll not bat an eye. But when you speak of his prowess with a bass, tread softly there, my friend. But in the sense that Darrell is, perhaps, not a bastard, well then you are not incorrect. |
| JB Contributed: 2007-08-17 | Murray, I played with Darrell Power: I knew Darrell Power; Darell Power was a friend of mine. Murray, you're no Darrell Power. |
| Sassy Senorita Contributed: 2007-08-15 | And he probably won't bring back any Walkers Crisps or Cadbury Buttons to share. Sheesh. |
| Toner Contributed: 2007-08-15 | So, it's like Mart's almost last night in the city and the continent and we're going to have a going away party at the Granite Brewery and Murray responds with this e-mail: "I'm leaving on a jet plane to England at 8 tomorrow night, so I won't be able to make it." Jet plane? England? What a pompous ass... What a bastard. |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-08-08 | Dear Mr. Sausage Maker... Did you also notice that the Bastard drank all your beer without bringing anything of his own... wait a minute... neither did I... What a Bastard. |
| Sausage Maker Contributed: 2007-08-08 | Murray came over last week with pizza even though tasty bbq'd sausages were on offer. Not thinking at all of the host's feelings, Murray had a sausage and then switched back to eating his pizza. Rude. Rude bastard. |
| TFC Observer Contributed: 2007-07-18 | Having watched Murray's behaviour at recent Toronto FC games, I suspect he is being domesticated at a rather frightening pace. Now that our Reds have been away for so long, will Murray come out to play after the next home game? Most think the bastard will not. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-06-29 | Happy birthday, Murray. Don't open the gift in the green packaging. Bastard |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-06-12 | Poor Kris! I voted for him! Twice! But never Murray. |
| PASpy Contributed: 2007-06-06 | Uh, that was cellar. Yank poor Kris out of the cellar... |
| PASpy Contributed: 2007-06-06 | VOTER ALERT! If you go to the Great Big Sea website right now, you can vote on what you'd most like to see featured among the GBS merch. Options are bumper stickers, hockey jerseys - AND Alan, Bob, Sean, Kris, and of course, the highly esteemed M the B. (Could someone with that site be attempting to acquire a sense of humor??? Nah...) Currently, Murray (with 11.65% of the vote) leads GBS posters, bumper stickers, Bob, and Kris, who languishes in last place with .77 percent. However, he trails Sean, hockey jerseys, and - by a suitably manly margin - Alan, with a whopping 35.16 percent of the vote. So go to www.greatbigsea.com, and yank poor Kris out of the dellar! Or vote for Murray, I guess (though I have to say, Alan suits my boudoir decor just a bit better). |
| Porch Sitter Contributed: 2007-06-01 | We spent a lovely, spring evening sitting on the deck chatting and enjoying each other's company when all of a sudden, we start talking about Murray and how mtb.com is due for an AGM. An AGM already? It's been a year? Our bloody V.P. of Marketing Operations hasn't voiced one idea, let alone produced a coherent marketing strategy. Who's running this place? Though, I suppose a site such as this can only mirror the dubious talents of its unfortunate muse... |
| Rabble-Rouser Contributed: 2007-05-29 | Calling all detractors and enemies... Where - Hugh's Room When - May 30th, 8:30 pm Why - Bastardly performance Bring your rotten fruit. |
| Typical Contributed: 2007-05-25 | Another Toronto FC game, another Foster disappointment. Before the game Murray was desperate to find an extra ticket. Favours and first-borns were promised, bribes were made. As a jaded cynic, I rolled my eyes knowing in my heart that Murray would probably skip the game anyway. And skip the game he did. |
| Mr Angry Contributed: 2007-05-13 | Sitting next to the bastard is always a chore, but yesterday at the TFC game, he proved his bastardfulness when he grabbed my commemorative seat cushion, and flung it in anger at the pitch. Not only did he not care for my priceless momento, but he could have hurt someone. Shame, Bastard, shame... |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-05-07 | Fine article, Samantha... GBS is certainly a good band... even with that Bastard yanking on the bass strings. Fortunately you weren't treated the way Mr. Foster treats his friends... He punched me in throat once... then kicked my in the seeds... Once, while sleeping on his couch he put my hand in a bowl of warm water... The only reason, he didn't bring up soft lumber is because he didn't want to show you his twig and berries. Yep... he's a bastard through and through. |
| Don't let veneer fool you Contributed: 2007-05-04 | As regards Ms. Bennett's fine article concerning GBS in Pittsburgh, one can only conclude that Murray was tipped off to her presence and that behind-the-scenes puppet masters controlled what he said. Under normal conversational circumstances, Murray would have caused offence by minute one and then caused an international incident by minute two. How else can it be explained that Ms. Bennett never called him a bastard? |
| Samantha Bennett Contributed: 2007-04-27 | I'm a newspaper columnist in Pittsburgh, Pa. and I went to the Great Big Sea concert here last week. The rest of the band apparently sent Murray out to pick up food after the show while they hid in the bus. I spotted Murray at the diner and, having been an admirer of Moxy Fruvous, too, went up to say hi. Here's what I wrote about that in my next column: A tip from a groupie after the show led me to bassist Murray Foster, fetching food for the band at Tom's Diner. We had a brief discussion of, I kid you not, Canadian-American relations. He was gracious enough not to bring up softwood lumber. OK, maybe that doesn't make your heart skip a beat, but I'm a journalist. With an English degree. Full text of rather breathless column, FYI: http://www.post-gazette.com/pg/07115/780980-151.stm |
| Editorial Staff Contributed: 2007-04-26 | I am writing from Stockholm where mtb.com staff is getting an international perspective on Murray's reputation. It turns out no one here knows who he is. What a waste of shareholder dollars, bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-04-26 | Murray needs to put the cukes aside and give us evidence of his presence. Or his bass will get peed in again... and again... |
| PAspy Contributed: 2007-04-23 | I finally, finally had the pleasure of viewing Murray (and the others) in the friendly confines of a local dive theater the other night. Bastard? He is a sprite, an imp, a veritable bass guitar god. Alan grabbed his butt at one point. Would that it were me (instead of either Alan or Murray, but that's another board...). |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-04-19 | I peed in Murray's upright bass. Take that, you bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-04-17 | Yes, Murray is the infamous Cuke Killer. You've heard of him on the news, you've read of him in the papers. Now, his identity is revealed. Murray the Bastard Cuke Killer. Poor, poor Bob. I pity his next victims. The poor, defenseless, cookie-less bandmates. If you play an instrument, you'd better beware. Murray is out to stroke it, and whack you with his English cock... er... cuke. |
| The Other Contributed: 2007-04-17 | Those poor poor cucumbers. You bastard! Won't somebody please think of the cucumbers? ...Oh yea, and Bob...poor Bob. But those poor defenseless cucumbers, Foster you heartless vegetable beating Bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-04-16 | Murray is busy beating up Bob with English cucumbers. Bastard. |
| The Other Contributed: 2007-04-15 | There has been little talk of the Bastard in these parts lately. Has the Bastard gone into hiding, waiting for the optimum moment to unleash his basterdish ways upon an unsuspecting world? Come out, come out wherever you are you bastard... |
| Andres K Contributed: 2007-04-14 | I don't believe this site exists. I am writing this but I still don't believe there's finally an ode to Foster's bastardness. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-04-08 | Happy Easter, Bastard. Don't eath the eggs that come from the chicken's ass. |
| Just 'cause Contributed: 2007-03-31 | Murray Foster is a bastard. Like renewing your first aid certification or driver re-training for old people, it's stuff we already know but it's always good to be reminded. Murray = Bastard. M=B. |
| The Other Contributed: 2007-03-31 | Oh great Foster, please teach me the ways of the Bastard! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2007-03-27 | Bastard REFUSES to come to Halifax. WHAT is your PROBLEM? |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-03-17 | Happy Paddy's Day, Bastard. The Newfie and Nova Scotian b'ys will show you how it's done. Don't eat the clover, and if you get wasted on Guinness, please take care not to throw up on Bob's shoes. |
| Ms. Myshert Contributed: 2007-03-07 | So BLFC brunches are great! Drinking all day, tasting some great bacon and having a laugh with your mates....but watch out for your clothes. Anything left behind is fair game, including pastel kitty t-shirts. He admits to flaunting the shirt in front of the mirror while dancing to his own tunes....what a bastard! |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-02-26 | I may have to revise my thoughts of Murray's bastardness. Not only did I get my skiis back, but I got someone else's skiis as well. Both pairs in excellent shape. So for this time, and this time only, Murray is not a bastard... although the owner of the other pair may think so. |
| Shall Remain Nameless Contributed: 2007-02-22 | Dear Lord, Your skis are not in Murray's basement. The Bastard sold them to pay for his vacation in Cuba. That's what happens when you only work 20 days since May. Maybe you'll like snowboarding better. |
| Concerned citizen Contributed: 2007-02-16 | I was a Fruvous fan. We got a new cat. My boyfriend wanted to name him Murray, so we did (after some economist.) I insisted that his middle name be Foster. And do you know what? Even before I found this site, I knew Murray was a bastard. He should be proud of his namesake. |
| The Lord Contributed: 2007-02-15 | I'm going skiing next week. My skiis are in Murray's basement. Murray is in Cuba. This would make him a double bastard... I hope it rains all week. |
| The BJ Contributed: 2007-02-09 | At 8:30 am on February 9, 2007 The Bastard and I had plans for a lovely breakfast at the sketchiest diner in town. I was very excited and made sure to wear my best trailer trash outfit to fit in with the crowd. I awoke and checked my email to start the day only to find that he had ditched via a note sent at 4:00am! What if I never checked my email this morning? I would still be sitting there crying into my bad coffee and stale toast with the best bums and hookers on the East End wondering where he was. You owe me the best waffles money can buy my friend! |
| deviant Contributed: 2007-02-09 | Murray Foster is a bastard coated bastard with bastard filling. He also killed my Grandma, the jerk. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-01-28 | Jian is playing a gig with Mike Ford. He calls it Moxy Früvous. I say, you can't have Früvous without a bastard. Maybe Jian is a bastard? |
| Green Monster Contributed: 2007-01-25 | Murray tried to trip me so I tripped him better. So is he the bastard, or am I? |
| Don Contributed: 2007-01-19 | That Murray can sure play a mean game of footy, even if his sense of style is outright bastardly! |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-01-15 | Murray put on an amazing spread for the BLCF brunch today. I proved to be a man of beer drinking mastery with a 7 out of 9 correct guesses in the beer tasting challenge. Maybe I drink to much? Maybe I just know my beer. Maybe Murray is a Bastard? No... today, Murray was no bastard! Love you baby! Thanks for the lack of memories... |
| Some Woman Contributed: 2007-01-12 | Murray mentioned going to see a flick together - Little Miss Sunshine. I called him to set it up. That was 2 months ago - he still hasn't returned my call. Little Miss Sunshine? Little Murray Bastard, more like!! |
| Lord Contributed: 2007-01-11 | I was also at said party... he did infact mention his busy work schedule... then he left the party early, as his busy schedule required him to get up early, or some other lame excuse... WTF? What a BASTARD. |
| Fly on the wall Contributed: 2007-01-11 | I was recently at a party with Murray and overheard him saying that since May he has only worked 20 days. 20 days in 8 months! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2007-01-08 | He is lulling us into a false sense of security. Hmm, we wonder, has Murray changed his ways? Has he made a new years resolution to be not-a-bastard? We'll sit back, relax, feel that all is right with the world, then WHAMMO! That's when he'll strike. Bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2007-01-02 | Must we drag bastardisms OUT of Murray?! We seem to have run rather short. Hm. |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-12-24 | Merry Christmas, you bastard. Happy hangover. |
| Lord Santa Contributed: 2006-12-22 | All I want for Christmas is spell check... And Murray to receive a good beating. |
| Lord Santa Contributed: 2006-12-22 | As Murray, is a bastard, I'll take this oppoertunity to wish you all a Merry Christmas... and none of this happy holidays crap... All the best to all of you, and let's all get pissed. |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-12-07 | What's the bass equivilant of viagra? Anyone? |
| Disgusted Contributed: 2006-12-05 | His upright bass? Is that what he calls it? It didn't seem too upright to me... |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-12-02 | Bend over, it's over. What'd he try to do? Jam his upright bass up there?! |
| Disgusted Contributed: 2006-12-02 | Murray recently told me to bend over - and it wasn't meant in a nice way. Bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-11-20 | That's Alan Doyle. ;) Murray was paid big bucks just for door-holding priviledges, I'm sure. *giggles* Alan in his undies was cute. I think we need an outake where Mur is truly being bastard. Eating a donut and beating Kris up is not enough. |
| PAspy Contributed: 2006-11-20 | Since I have not yet had the pleasure of meeting M the B, I can only cultivate a virtual acquaintanceship via the Internet, CDs, etc. So I have been trolling the Great Big Sea website, which is featuring brief backstage "outtakes" from last spring's tour. Murray-spotting has been rewarding (plus on today's, you get to see Allan Doyle take off his pants). So these camera guys are following the band everywhere, apparently, including onto the tour bus right after a concert. Seems to me it might get a little intrusive, a little annoying - but not to our pal Murray, who is seen HOLDING OPEN THE BUS DOOR to let the paparazzi clamber on. Kudos to Mrs. Foster for raising such a polite boy. Bastard or not a bastard? |
| Peppermint Panties Contributed: 2006-11-19 | So, I fly all the way to freakin’ Toronto to see Murray perform with a couple of his bands. After the first gig, we tell him how much we are looking forward to a little Sunday afternoon jazz. “See you then.” the Bastard says. So we trek from the FAR western GTA all the way across the city, arriving just before the scheduled performance time, and guess what… no gig... some bullshit about a “sick band member”. Likely story. He was probably out watching the Santa Claus parade. Murray is truly a BASTARD. |
| Great Atomic Bastard Contributed: 2006-11-16 | True to form, Murray performs tonight but left too little time for detractors and enemies to organise the appropriate protests and heckling squads. If you happen to see him at Hugh's Room, call him a bastard from me. |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-11-06 | Murray trick-or-treated around town. He stole candy from innocent children. Bastard. |
| Man Utd fan Contributed: 2006-10-27 | Much like his beloved Liverpool FC, Murray bores me. |
| Toronto FC Supporter #1 Contributed: 2006-10-21 | Murray is in on Toronto FC season's tickets and today was the opening bbq where we got free burgers and hot dogs. BUT, Murray arrived so late that Mossman had to get the last hot dog for him. The Bastard took his sweet-ass time getting to the bbq and by the time he arrived, workers were taking down the tents. Apparently Murray's appetite is so precious that others should take care of it for him. He was late because Aston Villa vs Fulham was more important than making his own footie club's inaugural bbq. I won't bother you with how he pissed us off the rest of the night. Bastard. |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-10-19 | Does that mean more pancakes out of killer pumpkins? Blueberries are better. Bastard. |
| Anonymous BLFC Chick Contributed: 2006-10-18 | Murray, its time for the annual BLFC Breakfast. See if you can line up a date or other lame event to coincide. You're such a bastard. |
| Peppermint Panties Contributed: 2006-10-15 | So... we travel to freakin' New England to see Murray with one of his bands. He asks if we are going to the Pub. We say yes and tell him which one. He doesn't show. He's such a BASTARD!! |
| The Two Contributed: 2006-10-12 | Oh, it's not just the leaves. The snow is beggining to fall because of Murray's bastardly magnetic pull. He pulls all cold and wet things towards him, as is the case with the used plunger. I hate snow. You, sir, are guilty of bastardism! |
| Lord Contributed: 2006-10-12 | Autumn is upon us. Soccer, hockey, and football has started. The leaves are turning colours, and are falling. Why, you may ask? It's because of Muraay's bastardly smell, of course. |
| Concerned Detractor Contributed: 2006-10-11 | Now that summer is over, it seems about time for one of Murray's famous brunches. But has anyone heard from Murray about this? Has he said anything? No. And that's bastard-iculous. |
| Le Bastard Contributed: 2006-10-05 | Picture Paris, France. Picture "The Great Canadian," which is an bar located incongrously on the Left Bank (Rive Gauche) in Paris, France. Enter our intrepid traveller. There are Montreal Canadian jerseys on the wall. There's a statue of a Mountie. A bottle of Molson Canadian can be had for 6.50 Euros. A bottle of Moosehead is 5.50 Euros. The "Classic Canadian Breakfast" is "eggs, bacon, toast, baked beans, fried potatoes, pancakes and maple syrup." The conversation overhead at the next table concerns the Pittsburg Steelers' prospects in the coming season. But as our traveller sits down, he hears something familiar coming from the speakers behind the bar. It's nothing other than a Great Big Sea song. Shocked, and of course, dismayed, our traveller could hardly order his pint of Guinness (which is what he might drink in Canada, anyway). Murray, vous etes un bastard! I went to Paris to forget about you. But somehow or other you followed me. The only consulation: after the Great Big Sea song, the next song was by that other great -- even greater -- Canadian band, Matchbox 20. |
| Bored with Murray Contributed: 2006-10-05 | Has it really been weeks since Murray has done anything bastardly? Really, now. I heard through the grapevine that he has neglected Seattle fans and that he's not very gracious when he wins at Scrabble. |
| North Van C**T Contributed: 2006-09-13 | Murray thought he was cool and after we slaved to be there, he didn't say hi to us at the pub. What a bastard... |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-09-05 | Where the hell is my kitchen, ya bastard? |
| anonymous Contributed: 2006-08-31 | Murray's gonna be on TV on the 11th. Bastard. |
| Number 2 Contributed: 2006-08-23 | The Bastard Murray struck again. After a Lester's show last week, there was much rejoicing over a drink or 4... later on the Bastard decided to bend our rubber arms to go back to his place for drinks. Needless to say more rejoicing occured. All was good until I realized that making my 9am meeting the next morning would be tough, as it was only 5 hours away when I was finally released from the Bastard's clutches. Murray, not only are you a BASTARD... you're also a JERK. |
| Faith Contributed: 2006-08-16 | This is not so much a story as a comment on Murray. Steph likes to draw pictures of the other guys as adorable little things called Chibies. However, I have decided that Murray is too much of a bastard to become cutesified. Why? He ate a turkey sandwich in front of another member who wanted it! That was a BASTARDLY thing to do Murray. BAD!! No Chibi for you! Also, turkey sandwiches are awesome. You should've let me have it. >_> PS: if this post doesn't look right... don't hurt me. I'm not sure why it keeps reformatting!! o_o Murray's Editor: Adding your own html line breaks will double up the spacing. |
| Playa Hata Contributed: 2006-08-11 | Using his silent online charm and machismo, Murray has made girls with half-names fight each other over him online, and one can only assume, break down in shivering wrecks at night thinking about what to say about him next. And in my book, anyone who makes little girls cry is a Bastard. |
| Disappointed Contributed: 2006-08-03 | Not long ago I arrived at the cottage on a Friday looking forward to a relaxing weekend. I checked my cel messages and Murray had called - some band called Great Big Sea was playing the next night in Toronto and he wanted to know if myself and friends would like to be on the guest list. Well, what the heck? Had I been given more than a day's notice, I may have stayed in town to support the bassist and his backing band. However, once at the cottage I was hardly going to drive back just to find out that he was probably lying and that my name was actually on a list of volunteers to clean the aisles after the show. Suffice it to say, he clearly faked a nice offer knowing that he would not have to follow through. Bastard. |
| Some woman Contributed: 2006-07-18 | Murray asked me to help him build a patio. He suggested we dig a deep hole. He picks up a shovel and hands me.. a pitchfork. The Bastard now has a beautiful patio. |
| Robi Contributed: 2006-07-18 | Murray sat in my chair during the website AGM. I was forced to sit under the stairs- from where nobody could hear my desperate bids to become a murraythebastard.com shareholder. However, from where I sat I gained insight into the corruption of the controlling shareholders and the inconsistency of the accounting practices used by the site. I left the AGM satisfied in knowing that a financial audit would one day force the site to be shut down. I later put the $2.35 I'd saved in my piggy bank with a grin. PS: I also have reason to believe it was The Bastard himself that flicked lit smokes on poor Anne's patio umbrella.........intentionally! My reason? The action fits Murray's profile! |
| The Emperor Contributed: 2006-07-18 | "Oh yeah, we'll play golf," the Bastard says. Then he pisses off to make some woman build his patio, between rainstorms. I don't get my practice in, and next week I shoot an 11 on the 6th at Scarlett Woods. Embrassed beyond belief in front on my hired hands, the Radiologist, the Lawyer, and the Engineer (all three needed for various safety reasons). Bastard is TOTALLY to blame for this, and knows it, which is why he's left town. Didn't even know Great Big Sea or Atomic Power covered Run To The Hills. Am sharpening my 4-iron as I speak. |
| Shareholder Contributed: 2006-06-28 | No doubt, Murray was sniffing my sheets... I've caught the Bastard trying to sniff my shorts... and that's when I've been wearing them! |
| World Cup Fan Contributed: 2006-06-27 | Just to clarify - I was there watching the game with Murray and his feet were not on the coffee table. Though, I am not sure what he was doing in the bedroom by himself for most of the second half... |
| Shareholder Contributed: 2006-06-22 | So there was Murray... watching the Netherlands play Argentina at my place on the big screen yesterday... drinking beer... eating chips... his ass in my sofa... his feet on my coffee table... does this make him a bastard? On it's own no, but the fact that I was at work at the time, missing the game, truly makes him a BASTARD. |
| questionable practices Contributed: 2006-06-13 | Let me get this straight, there is a link on the first page of this site to a new site and there is a link on the Atomic whatever site back to this site.....and the AGM is upcoming.....interesting, very interesting.....how do you say conflict of interesting......and all of this because Murray is a bastard.....I hope he does not become one lucky bastard by buying shares on the site created to inform the world of his personality flaw! |
| Shareholder Contributed: 2006-06-08 | Murray... You played the gig at Hugh's Room last night. You personally invited me. You stopped to chat with me. You sang beautifully. You strummed like a champ. You looked great. You made me laugh. You made me cry. And for making me cry, you are a BASTARD. |
| North Van C**T Contributed: 2006-06-01 | True, true. He did pick all the pretzels out and leave them discarded on the table or lying around hap-hazardly. What a bastard. Pretzels in my bed. Next time it's ONLY pretzels! That'll learn 'im! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-05-31 | If'n I was you, I'd serve ONLY pretzels. It'd serve the bastard right! |
| North Van C**T Contributed: 2006-05-30 | Oh shit...Murray is coming back to Vancouver...AND Victoria!? Maybe he'll come to our party again, eat everything and then leave first. What a bastard... |
| Manager Contributed: 2006-05-25 | Murray, you bastard. Your footie duffle bag is still at our place. Don't make me auction this stuff off... |
| Silky Johnson Contributed: 2006-05-17 | "Weel if it isn't the most diabolical bastard this side of the Mississippi." |
| Interloper Contributed: 2006-05-12 | Murray has yet to posit my identity. Bastard. |
| One of Murray's friends Contributed: 2006-05-02 | We are all busy beating Murray... Beating him with sticks... beating him with fists... beating him with his own bass... We are beating him because he is a bastard... Let the beatings continue... |
| Piscogirl Contributed: 2006-04-23 | Just came back from the NYC show, and Murray didn't do my request, the Bastard! I mean, I'm just *sure* the GBS crowd would adore "Love Set Fire." |
| Anonymous Colleague Contributed: 2006-04-21 | Murray is sitting beside me right now and reeks of Bastard. |
| Grump Contributed: 2006-04-12 | After spending my paltry earnings on some St. Paddy's trinkets for the group of boys that Murray hangs out with in the evenings, I carefully laid them at Murray's feet at the show that night. Hoping that Murray would see that there was enough for everyone, and hand them out accordingly, I was shocked to see him brazenly take one for himself and hang it on his microphone stand...completely ignoring his mates. The rest lay at his feet like the cast-offs of Survivor...only to be swept away by a stagehand after the show. For this selfishness, Murray, you are a total bastard! |
| Majority Minority Shareholder #1 Contributed: 2006-04-08 | After the game Wednesday, Murray reaches into his pocket and throws $30 my way. I've heard of this tactic used by him before, but I was in no way interested in his romantic advances. He then told my startled face it was to pay back his debt from soccer last spring (see: entry from Robin, May 2005). Apparently, my largesse had supplied Robin with the money to supply Murray with his alcohol. Suddenly flush with found dosh, I proceeded to order wings and later that night, a burger or four, the result of which will probably be my demise from heart failure in thirty-odd years. Thanks Murray - thanks for trying to kill me, you murderously noble bastard!! |
| appalled Contributed: 2006-04-06 | I saw Murray at the grocery store a while back lovingly stroking a cucumber....not the English variety either - the field type......now it makes sense. Previously I thought he strange, now I realize it goes deeper. I wanted that cucumber. Bastard. |
| Interloper Contributed: 2006-03-30 | I am having waaay too much fun with Murray in Australia. He probably wants to stop me. That's because he's a bastard. |
| Shareholder Contributed: 2006-03-29 | To respond to the previous post... I must agree with the. "I saw Muray... blah, blah, blah" crap is rather tiresome. I've slept with him, and it was really not that memorable... (remember, sweetie)? So let's bring it back to why we are here. Murray... and the fact that he is a BASTARD. Ladies, what you see before you, when Murray is on stage without his bass guitar hiding it, is a cucumber. That's right. Murray wears a cucumber. He wears it to mask an unfortunate gardening accident from years ago in the fabled fields of Thornhill... I cannot get into the details, but let's just say that it was a long story and now it's quite a short one. So to you, Murray (you little dick), you are a BASTARD. |
| disgusted 2 Contributed: 2006-03-28 | shut this site down! it was formerly a humourous ode to the bastard in MF, now it is just an ode that belongs on a fansite.....I don't want to read about Murray hugs - I want lies, stealing, death, murder, pillaging - all in the name of his bastardom.......come on now, gimme a good story! Someone who actually associates with Murray must have something of merit. |
| Red Contributed: 2006-03-22 | Yeah, met Murray twice in the last week, once in London with the green-clad lass (oh, and nice nickname you gave me, so original, how ever did you come up with it? sheesh..) and once in Montreal, he was with that other guy from his band I met before and a third band member. I was trying to talk to him, and he wouldn't even pay attention to me! The bastard... Then again, for a bastard, he sure does give nice hugs... |
| Steph Contributed: 2006-03-22 | Saw the Great Big Sea boys live last Monday. *coughs* Alan was absolutely gorgeous. *cough* To my dismay, the bastard has an amazing voice!! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-03-19 | yikes, who was that drooling fan-girl? Wasn't me, musta been my evil twin. ANYWAY, was having lunch with my friend Red at Covent Garden Market in London last Wed. Ran into Murray (and some other guy from Murray's band) purely by coincidence. Well Red's a big fan, so she asked him for a picture, which I took. Not once, NOT ONCE, did he ask if I wanted a picture. I mean I would have declined, as it was purely coincidence that we happened to meet there for lunch, and I was wearing my horrifically ugly work uniform (some of us work for a living) and had my hair in a ponytail and minimal makeup on, but he didn't even OFFER. Bastard! (took a pic of Red with the other guy too, just so he wouldn't feel like an also-ran) |
| Disgusted Contributed: 2006-03-16 | Murray, get out of the green tanktop. You sound like a silly bastard giggling about yourself. |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-03-15 | top notch bastard |
| Interloper Contributed: 2006-03-14 | Murray once didn't read my submission to his adventure in Australia. The bastard!!! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-03-02 | He makes pancakes out of killer pumpkins? What a bastard! Oh, OH, you mean..oh, I get it. never mind. |
| Mikk Contributed: 2006-03-01 | Finally a free Sunday. And what does Murray do? He invokes the magic words "BLFC Brunch III"... That bastard knows we can't say no... Even though he makes killer pumpkin pancakes, he is still, and ALWAYS will be, A BASTARD. |
| The Travellin' Wanna-be Cowgirl Contributed: 2006-02-23 | When Murray sings, his baritone is so resounding, I can feel it in my chest. It is a redundant statement to call him a bastard for such musical behaviour. |
| OBD Contributed: 2006-02-15 | So Murray eats all the munchie mix, except for the pretzels. Do you think he left them for me? Ah NO. Oh wait, I wasn't at that party. Doesn't matter...he's still a bastard. |
| Steph Contributed: 2006-02-14 | Wait... I love pretzels! Does that make him less of a bastard? ....... Nah! |
| The North Van C**ts Contributed: 2006-02-13 | Murray came to our party, and we had Munchie Mix. He ate everything but the pretzels. What a bastard... |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-02-10 | Murray! You scared the crap out of me, you bastard. Busses tend to work much better when they are upright. |
| Single White Male friend Contributed: 2006-02-07 | That rat BASTARD Murray signed an autograph for you????? I've tried buying him beer... I've tried giving him scotch... I've given him encouraging words during our soccer games... I even spent a few nights sleeping with him... you remember, don't you sweetie??? All I ever got from that BASTARD is genital herpes. Murray is a Bastard. |
| Frances from Stratford Contributed: 2006-02-07 | My mistake, Sorry. I realized after I posted the message I spelled it wrong. It is Alan. My apologies to Alan!! Love you all! |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-02-04 | ALAN is a celtic name meaning handsome. ALLEN is an anglo-saxon name meaning he who pumps gas down at the NOCO for the rest of his life. MURRAY is a scottish name meaning bastard. |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-02-04 | ALAN, dear. |
| Frances from Stratford Contributed: 2006-02-04 | I met Murray in Stratford the other day at The Festival Theatre, and lets just say a friend of his named Allen, called him a bastard! Then he told us to check out the website, murraythebastard.com! I didn't think he was serious at first, but here it is!! I just wanted to say that you guys always put on an amazing show and this one was no different! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I must say though, that Murray is the least of the bastards. Murray was the first one to come out for autograph's after the show. Then Kris came along, then finally Allen!! It took a while, but Kris finally gave in and grabbed a few of the fans CD's and went on the tour bus to get the autograph's of Sean and Bob. But Bob didn't sign our CD's, just Sean! So, long story short, I think Bob is the bastard for not signing my CD!!! Lol. (I love you Bob) but, in the end, 4 out of 5 band memebers autographs aint bad!! I look forward to hopefully seeing you guys again in Kitchener on May 4. I've already seen GBS live 5 times; (remember my poster guys! :) and this wasn't the last time!! I CAN'T BELEIVE YOU FINALLY MADE IT STRATFORD!!! (My hometown) Keep on playing guys!! Love you all!! See you again soon!! |
| a fan Contributed: 2006-02-03 | what a bastard. |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-02-02 | Well, turns out it WASN'T broken, that part is supposed to come off, but he THOUGHT he broke it, and that's what really matters. |
| girl in green Contributed: 2006-02-02 | Murray broke my sharpie. My favorite colour too. |
| Anonymous Colleague Contributed: 2006-02-02 | I'm trying to surf the "interweb" as the Bastard calls it and he's sitting here trying to annex both the front lounge table and iBook forcing me out on my ass! Like a Bastard's time is more important than mine. ...Bastard. |
| Märt Contributed: 2006-01-26 |  Everyone owed me fifty bucks and pretty much paid up at once...except Murray. What does Murray do? He spits his gum in a 10 cent Canadian Tire bill and gives it to me. What an asshole...I mean bastard. |
| The Plunger Contributed: 2006-01-05 | Mffff... gurgle... mffff...!!!!!! |
| Film buff Contributed: 2006-01-05 | DJ Lovell and I went to watch a children's matinee in the Beaches over the holidays, with two bottles of red wine, and a nice dose of rye. The kids didn't laugh nearly as much as we did, so after we told them about how immature they were, we went to a local establishment to further castigate their taste in claymation features. From there, we called Murray. He said he'd love to come out, but had a date. Wow! Has there ever been a love-torpedo that goes the speed of Murray? It was a Wednesday afternoon, and the man had a date. Well, he said he had to go "practice making music", but what else could it mean? For making those who make children cry cry themselves, Murrray's a holiday bastard. |
| Murray admirer Contributed: 2006-01-05 | Happy New Year Murray! I love what you can do with that plunger. |
| a fan Contributed: 2005-11-25 | Murray's in Australia....the bastard |
| Murray's love child Contributed: 2005-11-14 | I've been waiting for you to come and find me. You haven't sent me one single cent, and you haven't picked up the phone once to call me or mom. You are a bastard. |
| BLFC Brunch Contributed: 2005-11-06 | Murray's brunch in progress report: I woke up at 10:30 am...I was like, there is no way I am going to make the Man U-Chelsea game in time... I said f*** it, I took a cab, bought a 24 and decided to just let loose. NO ONE expected me to show up... I did. and THEN at 3:30 Murray suddenly decides to go to a baby shower... WHAT A BASTARD Toner |
| Jilted Date Contributed: 2005-11-04 | I heard that another Lagerkusen brunch is taking place at Murray's house. At the last one, Murray left halfway to go on a date with me. I thought his willingness to leave his own party was a good sign, but I was wrong. Murray paid little attention to me and you could tell he wished he was home at the brunch. Either that or he was pre-occupied with the possible damage being done to his house. Either way, I hope he doesn't subject another girl to this kind of treatment at the next brunch. GO LAGERKUSEN! |
| Brandie-Jo Contributed: 2005-10-16 | Murray called me two hours before our not-date to tell me that he had to reschedule as he had forgotten about plans with the family. I was left alone to drink cheap beer, get hit on by a woman and listen to bad karaoke. This could have been prevented had he not double booked himself. Buy a day planner you bastard! My heart and liver will thank you.. |
| disturbed Reginan Contributed: 2005-10-06 | My people and I saw Murray with our own four eyes, walking around the Agridome in Regina, while here with Great Big Sea. He stood right by my friend's hubby, as we ooogled him...recognizing him from his Fruvous days, I made a comment...and he ran...ran like a little scared bunny through the security doors....we're watching you..Murray. |
| Someone in the Know Contributed: 2005-09-30 | I happen to know that Murray is indeed a bastard. I cannot reveal my identity for fear of legal action, but suffice it to say that I have seen Murray up close many days on the road. Recently after a concert, Murray approached the sandwich tray and asked, "does anyone want this last turkey sandwich?". I said no thanks, just to be polite, but deep down I wanted that sandwich, and he must have or should have known it, too. "Are you sure you don't want it?", he said, "Turkey sandwiches are your fav." with his thin mainland accent. "No you go ahead Foster" I said, fully expecting him to give me the sandwich anyway. And get this, HE EATS THE SANDWICH!!! Right there in front of me. He occasionally offered me a half or a bite or whatever, but he really wanted it all for himself. I was forced to have a black forest ham and swisse cheese sandwich with my imported beer and high end red wine. I was devastated. Clearly, Murray is a Bastard. |
| Mikk Contributed: 2005-09-06 | So this past weekend was Silvihari up at Jõekääru, or J.K. if you will... There was a report that Murray, the man himself would attend. But instead of attending this fine example of drinking to excess, Murray chose to get enough sleep to properly attend breakfast with his parents, and a bandmember and his wife. What kind of a choice was this? Sure seems like Murray took the easy way out of this one. We'll, Sir, you were missed... NOT. What a Bastard... total Bastard. Murray the Bastard |
| Glen Contributed: 2005-08-23 | On August 18, 2005, Murray advised, "OK, I'm in for a bit of footie tonight..." I, being a naive fool, arrived at the appointed time and place. But this tale has a strange twist. Incredibly, at the appointed time and place, and as he had said he would be, Murray was there. In shock and disbelief, I thought, "Can this be true? Has murraythebastard.com, which I consider to be the website of record, led me astray? Could it be wrong?" "Maybe," I thought, "maybe he's not such a bastard." Then, my senses returned to me. This, I realized, was but an example of that age-old fable, "The Little Bass Player Who Cried Wolf." There was, you see, no soccer. I was there, as was Murray, but his so-called friends weren't, not, I assume, in the least bit trusting him. He'd disappointed so often before. Murray, being Murray, just shrugged his shoulders. He muttered someting about "beer" and "girls," and then disappeared into thin air (or at least towards College St.). Murray, you bastard. You've burned too many bridges. Murray, you bastard. You've just burned one more. |
| Robi Contributed: 2005-07-18 | I was travelling from one bar to the next, when I saw a commotion at Dundas Square in Toronto. It was some sort of concert. I happened to see Murray back stage and yelled to him. He came over, shook my hand and we chatted about the soccer I haven't attended in 2 years. He asked me: "Are Paul and Mart back from Regina yet? They were there for my show." proving that he had seen and simply ignored his big fans out there. I didn't even know they were gone. Murray's band was pretty good. I was drunk. After the show, I went to the back fence and again Murray came to chat. We exchanged the names of bars we would visit later that evening. Our paths haven't crossed since. Murray was pretty decent towards me, but I guess this story reinforces Luke Chadwick's opinion that Murray is a bastard. |
| Luke Chadwick Contributed: 2005-07-14 | A wise man once said, "There's nothing worse than doing right, and being wronged". How true that is. After knowing that two of his "fans" were driving 28 hours non-stop from Toronto to Regina on a BLFC scouting trip to see all that is Murray (feat. GBS) play on Canada Day, you would have thought that the lad who aspires to save the world would acknowledge his devoted following. Particularly the two in question that yelled themselves hoarse 10m away backstage after the encore and show to get his attention. But no, Murray The Rockstar has no time for the little people. Instead, averting his gaze and acting like a octogenerian by playing with the cotton, or hair in his ears, or whatever it was, he zipped up his already zipped-up tracksuit and shuffled off to his next gig. Ouch. Our disappointed fans were barely consoled by the fine beer and loose morals that Albert Strasse had to offer. Next time you're at the Docks, though, Murray, good luck finding your way there. BLFC Management and Scouting unanimously issues a declaration condeming Murray as a bastard. |
| Anonymous GBS bandmember Contributed: 2005-07-04 | So we have this new-ish guy playing bass, and CTV covers the show like it was Murray the Bastard accompanied by Great Big Sea. What's up with that? Was it some conspiracy to glorify Richmond Hill, and keep the Newfies down? Or was it just that Murray looks so great up on stage, that the TV audience needed a good look at the beauty that is Murray? Either way, Murray is obviously a bastard... |
| Limpy McLimperson Contributed: 2005-05-27 | After suffering an injury on the soccer pitch that I alas cannot legally prove to be Murray's fault, he offered to drive me home. I politely declined but secretly think he didn't go far enough in insisting, leaving me to bicycle(!) home in shock. Today I needed assistance in getting to work as I can no longer drive myself. This is surely the Bastard's fault and yet, if I were to have him killed, I would be the one to go to jail! |
| Robin Contributed: 2005-05-27 | So after a rousing match of soccer last night, we all made our way over to Scallywags. Many pitchers were consumed, and Murray sat there contentedly rubbing his belly after a very satisfying meal, before leaning over to me to say... "I have no cash" What a bastard... |
| Honey Child Contributed: 2005-04-14 | Murray is the very reason that women go crazy with desire. Not me though! I am just waiting until he notices me. |
| Forbes Contributed: 2005-03-26 | Mikk is a bastard too - I have proof. Can you make a site called MikkTheFarter.com? I want to post pictures of his naked ass with his sphincter opening to allow passage of hazardous gas. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2005-03-23 | I saw his new floor. It lookes really good. Murray looks really good on his floor. He was put ther by a thundering right cross. Now my knuckles hurt. I took one for the team, because... ...Murray is a Bastard. |
| Robi Contributed: 2005-03-14 | Murray's absence from the indoor soccer a few months ago scarred me both physically and emotionally. Had he been there, I would not have had to try so hard resulting in a busted ankle.(If he was on my team, I wouldn't have had to run, and if he wasn't on my team- I wouldn't have bothered.) The injury has surely shattered my life-long dream of one day playing for BLFC. At my last hockey playoff game I couldn't skate backwards properly, but had to play defence anyway. I got burned on 3 goals against. We lost 5-3. Now my whole team thinks Murray's a bastard too. Surely Murray knew about the defective turf all along, and he must be laughing at my pain right now. What a bastard! |
| BLFC Management Contributed: 2005-03-11 | Murray missed last night's hotly anticipated indoor soccer game because he was tiling his kitchen floor. Tiling his kitchen floor. |
| Jeff Contributed: 2005-02-07 | I just wanted to say that I've been calling Murray a bastard for about 20 years now, (and thinking it for about 22 years), but I never thought my assessment of him was shared by so many. What a great opportunity to comiserate with others about what a bastard that bastard Murray is. Murray is a bastard! Thanks again. |
| Anonymous Contributed: 2005-01-29 | Murray, You are a breakfast slut. Pick one breakfast and stick to it! |
| Rachel Contributed: 2005-01-26 | I met him once and he gave me a lock of his hair telling me to "grow my own Murray at home". |
| Manager Matsoo Contributed: 2005-01-21 | No matter what Toner says, "The Show" was picked up for another season last night and he has rarely shone brighter. Any man who can get Erik two goals in one game deserves much credit! |
| Toner Contributed: 2005-01-15 | Murray plays bass about as well as he plays soccer....not well. The Show has been cancelled. What a bastard... |
| Toner Contributed: 2005-01-15 | So Murray organizes this big ass soccer game on the waterfront on a rainy Toronto January evening...everyone shows up, but him..... What a freakin' bastard. Nuff said. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-12-29 | I looked and looked and looked. But no present from Murray was found under the tree. I think Murray killed Santa |
| Risto Leivat Contributed: 2004-12-04 | One night, Murray held me. I have never felt so safe. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-11-08 | An early November Saturday night, a Murray poker game was a go. The players had a big win in sight, But Marcus was a no-show. Marcus Tamm, you are a bastard. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-11-08 | Once again Murray pulled a fast one. The party: Märt's birthday. In attendance: everyone, but Murray The issue: Murray is a bastard |
| Risto Contributed: 2004-10-31 | Murray once dribbled the soccer ball around me and left me looking a fool. I was no longer interested in playing defence...I just wanted to watch this magician do his thing. Thanks Murray. (you bastard) |
| anonymous colleague Contributed: 2004-10-15 | Foster bit me! I have photographic evidence. I'll see you in court, you pasty Bastard |
| Toner Contributed: 2004-09-18 | So we're all sitting around after soccer on Thursday having a gay old time, drinking beers, enjoying crazy Chinese parking and talking about penis swells, when all of a sudden Murray just gets up, declares he has to leave and goes...and this is at like 11:30 pm!!!! What the hell is up with that??? What a bastard. |
| Manager Matsoo Contributed: 2004-09-17 | Murray came to my place on a recent Thursday to drink some beer. We had just finished playing soccer so everyone was tired and happy to relax. After a couple of hours of enjoyable socialising, Murray had to leave. And leave he did - he left all his empty beer cans and pizza slice garbage strewn over our back porch. Reminded me of the flotsam from a shipwreck...without the water. Anyway, so much for just relaxing, guess who had to clean it up? Not Murray. To top it all off, his soccer gear was forgotten at my apartment and I had to bring it to him the next week. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-08-27 | Where exactly IS Murray? We have not seen, nor heard from the man for a few weeks now. Has rock and roll finally got to him? Has he grown out of his tight polyester pants? Are we, the little people, too insignificant for the man? Is he living the life of a rockstar? Limos, hotels, parties, groupies. Too good to play a little footie with his real friends? I say BULLSHIT. You, Sir, are a BASTARD. Brought to you from the "I Hate Murray" files. Murray is a BASTARD. BASTARD, BASTARD, BASTARD. |
| Unidentified male Contributed: 2004-08-16 | Soccer ball? I believe that was a tea bag. What a bastard |
| unidentified female Contributed: 2004-08-15 | soccer ball....... face......need I say more? |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-08-10 | My baseball team (known as the Alcoballics for obvious reasons)is one of 2 top teams in our league. We had 3 games left in the season going into our game this past Sunday. We needed to win the last 3 games to clinch 1st place. As luck would have it, we lost the game by default, due to a lack of commitment shown by the players on my team. Now we need some help from the other teams to finish 1st. This same lack of commitment has been shown by our very own Murray Foster when playing soccer, either Ghetto Style, or Lagerkusen Style. The Bastard Foster seems to find his professional carreer in music more important than his mates on the pitch. I blame our default on the Bastard Murray, because I'm sure someway or another, my players were following Murray's lead. Yet another undeniable bit of proof that Murray is a Bastard |
| Toomas Orav Contributed: 2004-08-09 | In August 2003, I travelled to Lakewood, New Jersey, to take part in an annual summer festival occurring nearby. Upon arrival, whom should I find there but none else than our erstwhile bastard, Murray Foster. During the course of festivities a mass game of charades broke out and Murray became somewhat engrossed - nay, obsessed - in the game. He impressively answered many of the music, arts and literature themed clues and dominated for long stretches of what was ostensibly a collegial affair. I successfully deciphered a film title acted out by Murray - 'Apocalypse Now' I think. I self-satisfyingly sauntered into the middle of the crowd and Murray whispered the next answer: Elvis Presley's "All shook up." Naturally, this is not a difficult act, but I am inclined to believe that Murray selected this title in hopes that I would shake my limbs like an epileptic in an earthquake. Everybody laughed his or her faces off. For that, Murray is clearly a bastard. |
| Marcus Contributed: 2004-08-09 | Murray, as we know, is frequently on tour and unavailable for frolic or hi-jinx. An unfortunate side-effect of these frequent absences is that Murray agrees to do things which he cannot fulfil, such as football-viewing excursions. It only gets worse, dear reader. Here is a recent horror no-show from Murray. We had made plans to raise a glass after a spate of touring. He would surely arrive back morally spent and physically exhausted. It would fall to me to assist in reviving his spirits with liberal doses of the distillers' art. No such luck as Murray returned to town but forgot our arrangement and left me to drink alone. Which I did. And then went on a gin-fuelled rampage in the basement, throwing stuff and cursing. Crestfallen, I nonetheless made plans for later in the same week with this unreliable friend. True to form, Murray the bastard would once again strain the fabric of our friendship as I sat at the Duke of York for a full 30 minutes in anticipation. In his defence, he did call to say he would be late but I had left my mobile in the car as I wanted no interruptions when spending quality time with a chum. Instead, I drank alone and was subjected to humiliations galore from the wait staff, who doubted that I had a friend to meet. I believe that all would agree the evidence against Murray is mounting. A pronouncement of Bastard is only fitting. |
| Paul Sambla Contributed: 2004-07-30 | I'd been saving all my sixpence and shillings with care for months, eagerly looking forward to the trip to Chicago to see my beloved Manchester United play, in the flesh. Murray was to be my roomate, and travelling partner. Oh joy, calloo, callai! Then however, he had to piss off to play a show in Calgary. I didn't have the heart to go to Chicago, instead, I stayed home, and got hit by a car while riding a bicycle. I guess it was the tears in my eyes, that I didn't see it. Well, what else would you expect from a Liverpool supporting bastard. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-07-12 | Murray had a birthday party at his house last night. I arrived to find a barbecue full of grilling hamburgers and sausages. I had just eaten dinner, and was too full to try some of the sweet smells coming from his barbecue. It pained me to watch others enjoying these juicy thick slabs and tubes of meat. For that, Murray is a bastard |
| Märt Matsoo Contributed: 2004-07-11 | I went to Turkey with Murray in October 2002 so I have had the experience of travelling with him.
Right now I am in Estonia and I can happily say that I am glad Murray is not here with me. He is a bastard. |
| Marcus Tamm Contributed: 2004-06-28 | Whether a product of nature or nurture, Murray is a bastard. When I used to travel with him and his musical companions in the years 1996-1997, I was frequently a first-row witness to all manner of Murray behaviour. Allow me to recount one episode that still leaves me smarting at the recollection. On the occasion of playing at Captain Trip's Rainforest Preserve in Utica, New York, I mentioned to the band that we should take in some local colour with our spare time the following day. Syracuse would only be a short drive and an afternoon of sightseeing would be a welcome diversion. Knowing that the delights of Utica are fabled across the upstate region, I lobbied for a trip to the Saranac brewery, where we might learn something of the brewer's craft and also refresh our road-weary souls. Mike suggested that we go to the children's museum, where we might also learn and renew. A vote was taken and the course was to go to the children's museum first and the brewery second, lest we offend staff and patrons at the museum with any possible whiff of fermentation. Very sensible as plans go. I should point out that Murray abstained from voting -in support of the local first nations' peoples, who were having some problem with the local government... or some equally baffling and misguided gesture that Murray is prone to. The staff at the children's museum were intrigued to find six men pay for admission with no youngsters in tow but we convinced them we were genuinely young at heart and not very creepy. Trouble started almost immediately as Dave lit up in an area not designated for smoking and Jian accosted a school tour group, asking the unsuspecting grade-threes whether a shirt such as the one he was wearing had ever been seen so near to the Adirondacks. We were on the verge of being asked to leave when Murray saw the Erie Canal exhibit and rushed forth to "captain" a virtual boat through the waterway, elbowing aside those who were clearly waiting in line. In his exuberance, Murray tripped and crashed into the ship's steering wheel, nearing impaling himself on several of the wheel's knobs. Not only were we escorted in shame from the museum, we had to go straight to the emergency room and have Murray's injuries attended to. I did not get to the brewery that day and indeed still await the experience. For that, I can thank Murray. |
| Mikk Altosaar Contributed: 2004-06-24 | I love Murray... ...but then, who doesn't. He's a Bastard. |
| David Lovell Contributed: 2004-06-23 | Murray took my faith in the human spirit to new heights when he agreed to accompany me in a quest to find a Turkish national team shirt on our last day in Istanbul.
The skies grew cloudy and we visited no less than six sports shops to find the jersey. Our flight was leaving soon and I was ready to give up. Murray looked into my eyes and said, "We'll find this shirt, or we'll miss this flight." At the seventh shop, we found the jersey. Murray decided not to get one. |
| Märt Matsoo Contributed: 2004-06-23 | I remember seeing Murray kissing someone in Cappadoccia, Turkey and I thought to myself, "I wish that were me!" |
| Heili Orav Contributed: 2004-06-23 | The first time I saw Murray was at a Thornlea S.S. assembly. All us kids got out of class and got to see these old guys playing music.
I thought, geez, the bassist sure does have funny hair. Doesn't he know that this is 1992? |
| David Lovell Contributed: 2004-06-23 | I find that whenever we are listening to music, I ask whether Murray can play the bass line and you know what? He always can! |